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NAMO TASSA BHAGAVATO
ARAHATO
SAMMASAMBUDDHASSA
Part 1
Meditation is the way to
achieve letting go. In meditation one lets go of the
complex world outside in order to reach the serene world
inside. In all types of mysticism and in many
traditions, this is known as the path to the pure and
powerful mind. The experience of this pure mind,
released from the world, is very wonderful and blissful.
During this meditation
retreat there will be some hard work at the beginning,
but be willing to bear that hard work knowing that it
will lead you to experience some very beautiful and
meaningful states. They will be well worth the effort!
It is a law of nature that without effort one does not
make progress. Whether one is a layperson or a monk,
without effort one gets nowhere, in meditation or in
anything.
Effort alone, though, is
not sufficient. The effort needs to be skilful. This
means directing your energy just at the right places and
sustaining it there until its task is completed. Skilful
effort neither hinders nor disturbs you, instead it
produces the beautiful peace of deep meditation.
In order to know where
your effort should be directed, you must have a clear
understanding of the goal of meditation. The goal of
this meditation is the beautiful silence, stillness, and
clarity of mind. If you can understand that goal then
the place to apply your effort, the means to achieve the
goal becomes very clear.
The effort is directed
to letting go, to developing a mind, which inclines to
abandoning. One of the many simple but profound
statements of the Lord Buddha is that "a meditator whose
mind inclines to abandoning, easily achieves Samadhi
(the goal of meditation)". Such a meditator gains these
states of inner bliss almost automatically. What the
Lord Buddha was saying was that the major cause for
attaining deep meditation, for reaching these powerful
states is the willingness to abandon, to let go and to
renounce.
During this meditation
retreat, we are not going to develop a mind which
accumulates and holds on to things, but instead we
develop a mind which is willing to let go of things, to
let go of burdens. Outside of meditation we have to
carry the burden of our many duties, like so many heavy
suitcases, but within the period of meditation so much
baggage is unnecessary. So, in meditation see if you can
unload as much baggage as you can. Think of these things
as burdens, heavy weights pressing upon you. Then you
have the right attitude for letting go of these things,
abandoning them freely without looking back. This
effort, this attitude, this movement of mind that
inclines to giving up, is what will lead you into deep
meditation. Even during the beginning
stages of this meditation retreat, see if you can
generate the energy of renunciation, the willingness to
give things away, and little by little the letting go
will occur. As you give things away in your mind you
will feel much lighter, unburdened and free. In the way
of meditation, this abandoning of things occurs in
stages, step by step.
You may go through the
initial stages quickly if you wish, but be very careful
if you so do. Sometimes when you pass through the
initial steps too quickly, you find that preparatory
work has not been completed. It is like trying to build
a town house on a very weak and rushed foundation. The
structure goes up very quickly, but it comes down very
quickly as well! So you are wise to spend a lot of time
on the foundations, and on the "first story" as well,
making the groundwork well done, strong, and firm. Then
when you proceed to the higher stories, the bliss states
of meditation, they too are stable and firm.
In the way that I teach
meditation, I like to begin at the very simple stage of
giving up the baggage of past and future.
Sometimes you may think that this is such an easy thing
to do, that it is too basic. However, if you give it
your full effort, not running ahead to the higher stages
of meditation until you have properly reached the first
goal of sustained attention on the present moment, then
you will find later on that you have established a very
strong foundation on which to build the higher stages.
Abandoning the past
means not even thinking about your work, your family,
your commitments, your responsibilities, your
history, the good or bad times you had as a child...,
you abandon all past experiences by showing no interest
in them at all. You become someone who has no history
during the time that you meditate. You do not even think
about where you are from, where you were born, who your
parents were or what your upbringing was like. All of
that history is renounced in meditation. In this way,
everyone here on the retreat becomes equal, just a
meditator. It becomes unimportant how many years you
have been meditating, whether you are an old hand or a
beginner. If you abandon all that history then we are
all equal and free. We are freeing ourselves of some of
these concerns, perceptions, and thoughts which limit us
and which stop us from developing the peace born of
letting go. So every "part" of your history you finally
let go of, even the history of what has happened to you
so far in this retreat, even the memory of what happened
to you just a moment ago! In this way, you carry no
burden from the past into the present. Whatever has just
happened, you are no longer interested in it and you let
it go. You do not allow the past to reverberate in your
mind.
I describe this as
developing your mind like a padded cell! When any
experience, perception, or thought hits the wall of the
"padded cell", it does not bounce back again. It just
sinks into the padding and stops right there. Thus we do
not allow the past to echo in our consciousness,
certainly not the past of yesterday and all that time
before, because we are developing the mind inclined to
letting go, giving away and unburdening.
Some people have the
view that if they take up the past for contemplation
they can somehow learn from it and solve the problems of
the past. However, you should understand that when you
gaze at the past, you invariably look through distorted
lenses. Whatever you think it was like, in truth it was
not quite like that! This is why people have arguments
about what actually happened, even a few moments ago. It
is well known to police who investigate traffic
accidents that even though the accident may have
happened only half an hour ago, two different
eyewitnesses, both completely honest, will give
different accounts. Our memory is untrustworthy. If you
consider just how unreliable memory is, then you do not
put value on thinking over the past. Then you can let it
go. You can bury it, just as you bury a person who has
died. You place them in a coffin then bury it, or
cremate it, and it is done with, finished. Do not linger
on the past. Do not continue to carry the coffins of
dead moments on your head! If you do then you are
weighing yourself down with heavy burdens, which do not
really belong to you. Let all of the past go and you
have the ability to be free in the present moment.
As for the future, the
anticipations, fears, plans, and expectations -- let all
of that go too. The Lord Buddha once said about the
future "whatever you think it will be, it will always be
something different"! This future is known to the wise
as uncertain, unknown and so unpredictable. It is often
complete stupidity to anticipate the future, and always
a great waste of your time to think of the future in
meditation.
When you work with your
mind, you find that the mind is so strange. It can do
some wonderful and unexpected things. It is very common
for meditator’s who are having a difficult time, who are
not getting very peaceful, to sit there thinking "Here
we go again, another hour of frustration". Even though
they begin thinking like that, anticipating failure,
something strange happens and they get into a very
peaceful meditation.
Recently I heard of one
man on his first ten day retreat. After the first day
his body was hurting so much he asked to go home. The
teacher said "Stay one more day and the pain will
disappear, I promise". So he stayed another day, the
pain got worse so he wanted to go home again. The
teacher repeated "just one more day, the pain will go".
He stayed for a third day and the pain was even worse.
For each of nine days, in the evening he would go to the
teacher and, in great pain, ask to go home and the
teacher would say, "just one more day and the pain will
disappear". It went completely beyond his expectations
that, on the final day, when he started the first sit of
the morning, the pain did disappear! It did not come
back. He could sit for long periods with no pain at all!
He was amazed at how wonderful is this mind and how it
can produce such unexpected results. So, you don't know
about the future. It can be so strange, even weird,
completely beyond whatever you expect. Experiences like
this give you the wisdom and courage to abandon all
thoughts about the future, and all expectation as well.
When you're meditating
and thinking "How many more minutes are there to go? How
much longer have I to endure all of this?" then that is
just wandering off into the future again. The pain could
just disappear in a moment. The next moment might be the
free one. You just cannot anticipate what is going to
happen.
When on retreat, you
have been meditating for many sessions, you may
sometimes think that none of those meditations have been
any good. In the next meditation session you sit down
and everything becomes so peaceful and easy. You think
"Wow! Now I can meditate!", but the next meditation is
awful again. What's going on here?
The first meditation
teacher I had told me something, which then sounded
quite strange. He said that there is no such thing as a
bad meditation! He was right. All those meditations
which you called bad, frustrating and not meeting your
expectations, all those meditations are where you do the
hard work for your "pay check"...
It is like a person who
goes to work all day Monday and gets no money at the end
of the day. "What am I doing this for?", he thinks. He
works all day Tuesday and still gets nothing. Another
bad day. All day Wednesday, all day Thursday, and still
nothing to show for all the hard work. That's four bad
days in a row. Then along comes Friday, he does exactly
the same work as before and at the end of the day the
boss gives him a pay check. "Wow! Why can't every day be
a pay-day?!"
Why can't every
meditation be "pay-day"? Now, do you understand the
simile? It is in the difficult meditations that you
build up your credit, you build up the causes for
success. Working for peace in the hard meditations, you
build up your strength, the momentum for peace. Then
when there's enough credit of good qualities, the mind
goes into a good meditation and it feels like "pay-day".
It is in the bad meditations that you do the work.
In a recent retreat that
I gave in Sydney, during interview time, a lady told me
that she had been angry with me all day, but for two
different reasons. In her early meditations she was
having a difficult time and was angry at me for not
ringing the bell to end the meditation early enough. In
the later meditations she got into a beautiful peaceful
state and was angry at me for ringing the bell too soon.
The sessions were all the same length, exactly one hour.
You just can't win as a teacher, ringing the bell!
This is what happens
when you go anticipating the future, thinking "How many
more minutes until the bell goes?" That is where you
torture yourself, where you pick up a heavy burden,
which is none of your business. So be very careful not
to pick up the heavy suitcase of "How many more minutes
are there to go?" or "What should I do next?" If that is
what you are thinking, then you are not paying attention
to what is happening now. You are not doing the
meditation. You have lost the plot and are asking for
trouble.
In this stage of the
meditation keep your attention right in the present
moment, to the point where you don't even know what day
it is or what time it is -- morning? afternoon? don't
know! All you know is what moment it is -- right now! In
this way you arrive at this beautiful monastic time
scale where you are just meditating in the moment, not
aware of how many minutes have gone or how many remain,
not even remembering what day it is.
Once, as a young monk in
Thailand, I had actually forgotten what year it was! It
is marvelous living in that realm that is timeless, a
realm so much more free than the time driven world we
usually have to live in. In the timeless realm, you
experience this moment, just as all wise beings have
been experiencing this same moment for thousands of
years. It has always been just like this, no different.
You have come into the reality of now.
The reality of now is
magnificent and awesome. When you have abandoned all
past and all future, it is as if you have come alive.
You are here, you are mindful. This is the first stage
of the meditation, just this mindfulness sustained only
in the present. Reaching here, you have done a great
deal. You have let go of the first burden which stops
deep meditation. So put forth a lot of effort to reach
this first stage until it is strong, firm and well
established. Next we will refine the present moment
awareness into the next stage -- silent awareness of the
present moment.
Part 2
In Part 1 of this
three-part article, I outlined the goal of this
meditation, which is the beautiful silence, stillness
and clarity of mind, pregnant with the most profound of
insights. Then I pointed out the underlying theme which
runs like an unbroken thread throughout all meditation,
that is the letting go of material and mental burdens.
Lastly, in Part 1, I described at length the practice
which leads to what I call the first stage of this
meditation, and that first stage is attained when the
meditator comfortably abides in the present moment for
long, unbroken periods of time. As I wrote in the
previous article "The reality of now is magnificent and
awesome... Reaching here you have done a great deal. You
have let go of the first burden which stops deep
meditation." But having achieved so much, one should go
further into the even more beautiful and truthful
silence of the mind.
It is helpful, here, to
clarify the difference between silent awareness of the
present moment and thinking about it. The simile of
watching a tennis match on T.V. is informative. When
watching such a match, you may notice that, in fact,
there are two matches occurring simultaneously -- there
is the match that you see on the screen, and there is
the match that you hear described by the commentator.
Indeed, if an Australian is playing a New Zealander then
the commentary from the Australian presenter is likely
to be much different from what actually occurred!
Commentary is often biased. In this simile, watching the
screen with no commentary stands for silent awareness in
meditation, paying attention to the commentary stands
for thinking about it. You should realize that you are
much closer to Truth when you observe without
commentary, when you experience just the silent
awareness of the present moment.
Sometimes it is through
the inner commentary that we think we know the world.
Actually, that inner speech does not know the world at
all! It is the inner speech that weaves the delusions
that cause suffering. It is the inner speech that causes
us to be angry at those we make our enemies, and to have
dangerous attachments to those we make our loved ones.
Inner speech causes all of life's problems. It
constructs fear and guilt. It creates anxiety and
depression. It builds these illusions as surely as the
skilful commentator on T.V. can manipulate an audience
to create anger or tears. So if you seek for Truth, you
should value silent awareness, considering it more
important, when meditating, than any thought whatsoever.
It is the high value
that one gives to one's thoughts that is the major
obstacle to silent awareness. Carefully removing the
importance one gives to one's thinking and realizing the
value and truthfulness of silent awareness is the
insight that makes this second stage -- silent awareness
of the present moment -- possible.
One of the beautiful
ways of overcoming the inner commentary is to develop
such refined present moment awareness, that you are
watching every moment so closely that you simply do not
have the time to comment about what has just happened. A
thought is often an opinion on what has just happened,
e.g. "That was good", "That was
gross", "What was that?" All of these
comments are about an experience which has just passed
by. When you are noting, making a comment about an
experience which has just passed, then you are not
paying attention to the experience which has just
arrived. You are dealing with old visitors and
neglecting the new visitors coming now!
You may imagine your
mind to be a host at a party, meeting the guests as they
come in the door. If one guest comes in and you meet
them and start talking to them about this that or the
other, then you are not doing your duty of paying
attention to the new guest that comes in the door.
Because a guest comes in the door every moment, all you
can do is to greet one and then immediately go on to
greet the next one. You cannot afford to engage in even
the shortest conversation with any guest, since this
would mean you will miss the one coming in next. In
meditation, all experiences come through the door of our
senses into the mind one by one in succession. If you
greet one experience with mindfulness and then get into
conversation with your guest, then you will miss the
next experience following right behind.
When you are perfectly
in the moment with every experience, with every guest
which comes in your mind, then you just do not have the
space for inner speech. You can not chatter to yourself
because you are completely taken up with mindfully
greeting everything just as it arrives in your mind.
This is refined present moment awareness to the level
that it becomes silent awareness of the present in every
moment.
You discover, on
developing that degree of inner silence, that this is
like giving up another great burden. It is as if you
have been carrying a big heavy rucksack on your back for
forty or fifty years continuously and during that time
you have wearily trudged through many miles. Now you
have had the courage and found the wisdom to take that
rucksack off and put it on the ground for a while. One
feels so immensely relieved, so light, so free because
one is now not burdened with that heavy rucksack of
inner chatter.
Another useful method of
developing silent awareness is to recognize the space
between thoughts, between periods of inner chatter. If
you attend closely with sharp mindfulness, when one
thought ends and before another thought begins -- THERE!
That is silent awareness! It may be only momentary at
first but as you recognize that fleeting silence you
become accustomed to it, and as you become accustomed to
it then the silence lasts longer. You begin to enjoy the
silence, once you have found it at last, and that is why
it grows. But remember, silence is shy. If silence hears
you talking about her, she vanishes immediately!
It would be marvelous
for each one of us if we could abandon the inner speech
and abide in silent awareness of the present moment long
enough to realize how delightful it is. Silence is so
much more productive of wisdom and clarity than
thinking. When you realize how much more enjoyable and
valuable it is to be silent within, then silence becomes
more attractive and important to you. The Inner Silence
becomes what the mind inclines towards. The mind seeks
out silence constantly, to the point where it only
thinks if it really has to, only if there is some point
to it. Since, at this stage, you have realized that most
of our thinking is really pointless anyway, that it gets
you nowhere, only giving you many headaches, you gladly
and easily spend much time in inner quiet.
The second stage of this
meditation, then, is silent awareness of the
present moment. You may spend the majority of
your time just developing these two stages because if
you can get this far then you have gone a long way
indeed in your meditation. In that silent awareness of
"Just Now" you will experience much peace, joy and
consequent wisdom.
If you want to go
further, then instead of being silently aware of
whatever comes into the mind, you choose silent present
moment awareness of just ONE THING. That ONE THING can
be the experience of breathing, the idea of loving
kindness (METTA), a colored circle visualized in the
mind (KASINA) or several other, less common, focal
points for awareness. Here we will describe the silent
present moment awareness of the breath.
Choosing to fix one's
attention on one thing is letting go of diversity and
moving to its opposite, unity. As the mind begins to
unify, sustaining attention on just one thing, the
experience of peace, bliss and power increases
significantly. You discover here that the diversity of
consciousness -- like having six telephones on ones desk
ringing at the same time -- is such a burden, and
letting go of this diversity -- only permitting one
telephone, a private line at that, on ones desk -- is
such a relief it generates bliss. The understanding that
diversity is a burden is crucial to being able to settle
on the breath.
If you have developed
silent awareness of the present moment carefully for
long periods of time, then you will find it quite easy
to turn that awareness on to the breath and follow that
breath from moment to moment without interruption. This
is because the two major obstacles to breath meditation
have already been subdued. The first of these two
obstacles is the mind's tendency to go off into the past
or future, and the second obstacle is the inner speech.
This is why I teach the two preliminary stages of
present moment awareness and silent awareness of the
present moment as a solid preparation for deeper
meditation on the breath.
It often happens that
meditator’s start breath meditation when their mind is
still jumping around between past and future, and when
awareness is being drowned by the inner commentary. With
no preparation they find breath meditation so difficult,
even impossible and give up in frustration. They give up
because they did not start at the right place. They did
not perform the preparatory work before taking up the
breath as a focus of their attention. However, if the
mind has been well prepared by completing these first
two stages then you will find when you turn to the
breath, you can sustain your attention on it with ease.
If you find it difficult to keep attention on your
breath then this is a sign that you rushed the first two
stages. Go back to the preliminary exercises! Careful
patience is the fastest way.
When you focus on the
breath, you focus on the experience of the breath
happening now. You experience "that which tells you what
the breath is doing", whether it is going in or out or
in between. Some teachers say to watch the breath at the
tip of the nose, some say to watch it at the abdomen and
some say to move it here and then move it there. I have
found through experience that it does not matter where
you watch the breath. In fact it is best not to locate
the breath anywhere! If you locate the breath at the tip
of your nose then it becomes nose awareness, not breath
awareness, and if you locate it at your abdomen then it
becomes abdomen awareness. Just ask yourself the
question right now "Am I breathing in or am I breathing
out? How do you know? There!". That experience which
tells you what the breath is doing, that is what you
focus on in breath meditation. Let go of concern about
where this experience is located; just focus on the
experience itself.
A common hindrance at
this stage is the tendency to control the breathing, and
this makes the breathing uncomfortable. To overcome this
hindrance, imagine that you are just a passenger in a
car looking through the window at your breath. You are
not the driver, nor a "back seat driver", so stop giving
orders, let go and enjoy the ride. Let the breath do the
breathing while you simply watch without interfering.
When you know the breath
is going in, or the breath is going out, for say one
hundred breaths in a row, not missing one, then you have
achieved what I call the third stage of this meditation,
sustained attention on the breath. This
again is more peaceful and joyful than the previous
stage. To go deeper, you now aim for full sustained
attention on the breath.
This fourth stage, or
full sustained attention on the breath,
occurs when one's attention expands to take in every
single moment of the breath. You know the in-breath at
the very first moment, when the first sensation of
in-breathing arises. Then you observe those sensations
develop gradually through the whole course of one
in-breath, not missing even a moment of the in-breath.
When that in-breath finishes, you know that moment, you
see in your mind that last movement of the in-breath.
You then see the next moment as a pause between breaths,
and then many more pauses until the out-breath begins.
You see the first moment of the out-breath and each
subsequent sensation as the out-breath evolves, until
the out-breath disappears when its function is complete.
All this is done in silence and just in the present
moment.
You experience every
part of each in-breath and out-breath, continuously for
many hundred breaths in a row. This is why this stage is
called "FULL sustained attention on the breath'. You
cannot reach this stage through force, through holding
or gripping. You can only attain this degree of
stillness by letting go of everything in the entire
universe, except for this momentary experience of breath
happening silently now. "You" don't reach this stage;
the mind reaches this stage. The mind does the work
itself. The mind recognizes this stage to be a very
peaceful and pleasant abiding, just being alone with the
breath. This is where the "doer", the major part of
one's ego, starts to disappear.
You will find that
progress happens effortlessly at this stage of the
meditation. You just have to get out of the way, let go,
and watch it all happen. The mind will automatically
incline, if you only let it, towards this very simple,
peaceful and delicious unity of being alone with one
thing, just being with the breath in each and every
moment. This is the unity of mind, the unity in the
moment, the unity in stillness.
The fourth stage is what
I call the "springboard" of meditation, because from
here one can dive into the blissful states. When you
simply maintain this unity of consciousness, by not
interfering, the breath will begin to disappear. The
breath appears to fade away as the mind focuses instead
on what is at the center of the experience of breath,
which is the awesome peace, freedom and bliss.
At this stage I use the
term "the beautiful breath". Here the mind recognizes
that this peaceful breath is extraordinarily beautiful.
You are aware of this beautiful breath continuously,
moment after moment, with no break in the chain of
experience. You are only aware of the beautiful breath,
without effort, and for a very long time.
Now you let the breath
disappear and all that is left is "the beautiful".
Disembodied beauty becomes the sole object of the mind.
The mind is now taking its own object. You are now not
aware at all of breath, body, thought sound or the world
outside. All that you are aware of is beauty, peace,
bliss, light or whatever your perception will later call
it. You are experiencing only beauty, with nothing being
beautiful, continuously, effortlessly. You have long ago
let go of chatter, let go of descriptions and
assessments. Here, the mind is that still that you can
not say anything.
You are just
experiencing the first flowering of bliss in the mind.
That bliss will develop, grow, become very firm and
strong. Thus you enter into those states of meditation
called Jhana. But that is for Part 3 of this talk!
Part 3
Parts 1 and 2 describe
the first four stages (as they are called here) of
meditation. These are:
1. Present moment
awareness.
2. Silent awareness of the present moment.
3. Silent present moment awareness of the breath.
4. Full sustained attention on the breath.
Each of these stages
needs to be well developed before going in to the next
stage. When one rushes through these "stages of letting
go" then the higher stages will be unreachable. It is
like constructing a tall building with inadequate
foundations. The first story is built quickly and so is
the second and third story. When the fourth story is
added, though, the structure begins to wobble a bit.
Then when they try to add a fifth story it all comes
tumbling down. So please take a lot of time on these
four initial stages, making them all firm and stable,
before proceeding on to the fifth stage. You should be
able to maintain the fourth stage, "full sustained
attention on the breath", aware of every moment of the
breath without a single break, for two or three hundred
breaths in succession with ease. I am not saying to
count the breaths during this stage, but I am giving an
indication of the sort of time interval that one should
remain with stage 4 before proceeding further. In
meditation, patience is the fastest way!
The fifth stage is
called "full sustained attention on the beautiful
breath". Often, this stage flows on naturally,
seamlessly, from the previous stage. As one's full
attention rests easily and continuously on the
experience of breath, with nothing interrupting the even
flow of awareness, the breath calms down. It changes
from a coarse, ordinary breath, to a very smooth and
peaceful "beautiful breath". The mind recognizes this
beautiful breath and delights in it. The mind
experiences a deepening of contentment. It is happy just
to be there watching this beautiful breath. The mind
does not need to be forced. It stays with the beautiful
breath by itself. "You" don't do anything. If you try
and do something at this stage, you disturb the whole
process, the beauty is lost and, like landing on a
snake's head in the game of snakes and ladders, you go
back many squares. The "doer" has to disappear from this
stage of the meditation on, with just the "knower"
passively observing.
A helpful trick to
achieve this stage is to break the inner silence just
once and gently think to yourself: "Calm". That's all.
At this stage of the meditation, the mind is usually so
sensitive that just a little nudge like this causes the
mind to follow the instruction obediently. The breath
calms down and the beautiful breath emerges.
When you are passively
observing just the beautiful breath in the moment, the
perception of "in" (breath) or "out" (breath), or
beginning or middle or end of a breath, should all be
allowed to disappear. All that is known is this
experience of the beautiful breath happening now. The
mind is not concerned with what part of the breath cycle
this is in, nor on what part of the body this is
occurring. Here we are simplifying the object of
meditation, the experience of breath in the moment,
stripping away all unnecessary details, moving beyond
the duality of "in" and "out", and just being aware of a
beautiful breath which appears smooth and continuous,
hardly changing at all.
Do absolutely nothing
and see how smooth and beautiful and timeless the breath
can appear. See how calm you can allow it to be. Take
time to savor the sweetness of the beautiful breath,
ever calmer, ever sweeter.
Now the breath will
disappear, not when "you" want it to but when there is
enough calm, leaving only "the beautiful". A simile from
English literature might help. In Lewis Carrol's "Alice
in Wonderland", Alice and the White Queen saw a vision
of a smiling Cheshire cat appear in the sky. As they
watched, first the cat's tail disappeared, then its paws
followed by the rest of its legs. Soon the Cheshire
cat's torso completely vanished leaving only the cat's
head, still with a smile. Then the head started to fade
into nothing, from the ears and whiskers inwards, and
soon the smiling cat's head had completely disappeared
-- except for the smile which still remained in the sky!
This was a smile without any lips to do the smiling, but
a visible smile nevertheless. This is an accurate
analogy for the process of letting go happening at this
point in meditation. The cat with a smile on her face
stands for the beautiful breath. The cat disappearing
represents the breath disappearing and the disembodied
smile still visible in the sky stands for the pure
mental object "beauty" clearly visible in the mind.
This pure mental object
is called a NIMITTA. "Nimitta" means "a sign", here a
mental sign. This is a real object in the landscape of
the mind (CITTA) and when it appears for the first time
it is extremely strange. One simply has not experienced
anything like it before. Nevertheless, the mental
activity called "perception" searches through its memory
bank of life experiences for something even a little bit
similar in order to supply a description to the mind.
For most meditator’s, this "disembodied beauty", this
mental joy, is perceived as a beautiful light. It is not
a light. The eyes are closed and the sight consciousness
has long been turned off. It is the mind consciousness
freed for the first time from the world of the five
senses. It is like the full moon, here standing for the
radiant mind, coming out from behind the clouds, here
standing for the world of the five senses. It is the
mind manifesting, not a light, but for most it appears
like a light, it is perceived as a light, because this
imperfect description is the best that perception can
offer.
For other meditator’s,
perception chooses to describe this first appearance of
mind in terms of physical sensation, such as intense
tranquility or ecstasy. Again, the body consciousness
(that which experiences pleasure and pain, heat and
cold, and so on) has long since closed down and this is
not a physical feeling. It is just "perceived" as
similar to pleasure. Some see a white light, some a gold
star, some a blue pearl…the important fact to know is
that they are all describing the same phenomena. They
all experience the same pure mental object and these
different details are added by their different
perceptions.
You can recognize a
nimitta by the following 6 features: 1) It appears only
after the 5th stage of the meditation, after the
meditator has been with the beautiful breath for a long
time; 2) It appears when the breath disappears; 3) It
only comes with the external five senses of sight,
hearing, smell, taste and touch are completely absent;
4) It manifests only in the silent mind, when
descriptive thoughts (inner speech) are totally absent;
5) It is strange but powerfully attractive; 6) It is a
beautifully simple object. I mention these features so
that you may distinguish real nimittas from imaginary
ones.
The sixth stage, then,
is called "experiencing the beautiful nimitta".
It is achieved when one lets go of the body, thought,
and the five senses (including the awareness of the
breath) so completely that only the beautiful nimitta
remains.
Sometimes when the
nimitta first arises it may appear "dull". In this
stage, one should go immediately back to the previous
stage of the meditation, continuous silent awareness of
the beautiful breath. One has moved to the nimitta too
soon. Sometimes the nimitta is bright but unstable,
flashing on and off like a lighthouse beacon and then
disappearing. Again this shows that you have left the
beautiful breath too early. One must be able to sustain
one's attention on the beautiful breath with ease for a
long, long time before the mind is capable of
maintaining clear attention on the far more subtle
nimitta. So train the mind on the beautiful breath,
train it patiently and diligently, then when it is time
to go on to the nimitta, it is bright, stable and easy
to sustain.
The main reason why the
nimitta can appear dull is that the depth of contentment
is too shallow. You are still "wanting" something.
Usually, you are wanting the bright nimitta or you are
wanting Jhana. Remember, and this is important, Jhanas
are states of letting go, incredibly deep states of
contentment. So give away the hungry mind, develop
contentment on the beautiful breath and the nimitta and
Jhana will happen by themselves.
The main reason why the
nimitta is unstable is because the "doer" just will not
stop interfering. The "doer" is the controller, the back
seat driver, always getting involved where it does not
belong and messing everything up. This meditation is a
natural process of coming to rest and it requires "you"
to get out of the way completely. Deep meditation only
occurs when you really let go, and this means REALLY LET
GO to the point that the process becomes inaccessible to
the "doer".
A skilful means to
achieve such profound letting go is to deliberately
offer the gift of confidence to the nimitta. Interrupt
the silence just for a moment, so gently, and whisper as
it were inside your mind that you give complete trust to
the nimitta, so that the "doer" can relinquish all
control and just disappear. The mind, represented here
by the nimitta before you, will then take over the
process as you watch it all happen.
You do not need to do
anything here because the intense beauty of the nimitta
is more than capable of holding the attention without
your assistance. Be careful, here, not to go assessing.
Questions such as "What is this?", "Is this Jhana?",
"What should I do next?", and so on are all the work of
"the doer" trying to get involved again. This is
disturbing the process. You may assess everything once
the journey is over. A good scientist only assesses the
experiment at the end, when all the data is in. So now,
do not assess or try to work it all out. There is no
need to pay attention to the edge of the nimitta "Is it
round or oval?", "Is the edge clear or fuzzy?". This is
all-unnecessary and just leads to more diversity, more
duality of "inside" and "outside", and more disturbance.
Let the mind incline
where it wants, which is usually to the center of the
nimitta. The center is where the most beautiful part
lies, where the light is most brilliant and pure. Let go
and just enjoy the ride as the attention gets drawn into
the center and falls right inside, or as the light
expands all around enveloping you totally. This is, in
fact, one and the same experience perceived from
different perspectives. Let the mind merge in the bliss.
Let the seventh stage of this path of meditation,
Jhana, occur.
There are two common
obstacles at the door into Jhana: exhilaration and fear.
Exhilaration is becoming excited. If, at this point, the
mind thinks "Wow, this is it!" then the Jhana is most
unlikely to happen. This "Wow" response needs to be
subdued in favor of absolute passivity. You can leave
all the "Wows" until after emerging from the Jhana,
where they properly belong. The more likely obstacle,
though, is fear. Fear arises at the recognition of the
sheer power and bliss of the Jhana, or else at the
recognition that to go fully inside the Jhana, something
must be left behind -- You! The "doer" is silent before
Jhana but still there. Inside Jhana, the "doer" is
completely gone. The "knower" is still functioning, you
are fully aware, but all the controls are now beyond
reach. You cannot even form a single thought, let alone
make a decision. The will is frozen, and this can appear
scary to the beginner. Never before in you whole life
have you ever experienced being so stripped of all
control yet so fully awake. The fear is the fear of
surrendering something so essentially personal as the
will to do.
This fear can be
overcome through confidence in the Buddha's Teachings
together with the enticing bliss just ahead that one can
see as the reward. The Lord Buddha often said that this
bliss of Jhana "should not be feared but should be
followed, developed and practiced often" (LATUKIKOPAMA
SUTTA, MAJJHIMA NIKAYA). So before fear arises, offer
your full confidence to that bliss and maintain faith in
the Lord Buddha's Teachings and the example of the Noble
Disciples. Trust the Dhamma and let the Jhana warmly
embrace you for an effortless, body-less and ego-less,
blissful experience that will be the most profound of
your life. Have the courage to fully relinquish control
for a while and experience all this for yourself.
If it is a Jhana it will
last a long time. It does not deserve to be called Jhana
if it lasts only a few minutes. Usually, the higher
Jhanas persist for many hours. Once inside, there is no
choice. You will emerge from the Jhana only when the
mind is ready to come out, when the "fuel" of
relinquishment that was built up before is all used up.
These are such still and satisfying states of
consciousness that their very nature is to persist for a
very long time. Another feature of Jhana is that it
occurs only after the nimitta is discerned as described
above. Furthermore, you should know that while in any
Jhana it is impossible to experience the body (e.g.
physical pain), hear a sound from outside or produce any
thought, not even "good" thoughts. There is just a clear
singleness of perception, an experience of non-dualistic
bliss, which continues unchanging for a very long time.
This is not a trance, but a state of heightened
awareness. This is said so that you may know for
yourself whether what you take to be a Jhana is real or
imaginary.
There is much more to
meditation, but here only the basic method has been
described using seven stages culminating with the First
Jhana. Much more could be said about the "five
hindrances" and how they are overcome, about the meaning
of mindfulness and how it is used, about the Four
Satipatthana and the Four Roads to Success (IDDHIPADA)
and the Five Controlling Faculties (INDRIYA) and, of
course, about the higher Jhanas. All these concern this
practice of meditation but must be left for another
occasion.
For those who are misled to conceive of
all this as "just Samatha practice" without regard to
Insight (VIPASSANA), please know that this is neither
Vipassana nor Samatha. It is called "Bhavana", the
method taught by the Lord Buddha and repeated in the
Forest Tradition of N.E. Thailand of which my teacher,
Ven. Ajahn Chah, was a part. Ajahn Chah often said that
Samatha and Vipassana can not be separated, nor can the
pair be developed apart from Right View, Right Thought,
Right Moral Conduct and so forth. Indeed, to make
progress on the above seven stages, the meditator needs
an understanding and acceptance of the Lord Buddha's
Teachings and one's precepts must be pure. Insight will
be needed to achieve each of these stages, that is
insight into the meaning of "letting go". The further
one develops these stages, the more profound will be the
insight, and if you reach as far as Jhana then it will
change your whole understanding. As it were, Insight
dances around Jhana and Jhana dances around Insight.
This is the Path to Nibbana for, the Lord Buddha said,
"for one who indulges in Jhana, four results are to be
expected: Stream Winner, Once Returner, Non Returner or
Arahant" (PASADIKA SUTTA, DIGHA NIKAYA). |